Life Uncategorized

Goodbyes and Get-On-With-Its

Last week marked a momentous occasion for the Zink household; I sent my beloved girl, Rebekah (pictured here at graduation with her best friend), off to college.

The date, of course, had been looming for a long, long time, ever since she was accepted in the Spring and we started receiving information about move-in. But somehow, it still came as a shock to actually drive away without her.

As many of you know, she and I are extraordinarily close. As she’s grown, she’s become more than a daughter. She’s become a friend and my nearly constant companion. Which is only part of the reason I know this will be good for her.

She’s only going to school about a half hour away. In fact, she could easily have commuted (and many of the local kids here do commute to this university). But I really felt that it was time for her to get out in the world, to see some of it through the lens of her own eyes, to develop memories and experiences apart from those we’ve shared.

All of which is a reminder how very much our children teach us. Because I’ll be honest – it was tempting. Aside from the obvious incentive of keeping her home, there were very real financial incentives for commuting, too (room and board makes up more than half the tuition).

But, as my children have taught me, love isn’t selfish. As much as I want to keep them close, I also want them to see and experience everything the world has to offer. And they just can’t do that from home.

My mantra to them lately has been, “Adventure is out there!!! Not in here… Out THERE!”

And it is. Not just for them, but for me, too. For years, I’ve been daydreaming about the places I want to see and the things I want to do when the kids are all grown up. Soon, I’ll get my chance. So it’s time to put my money where my mouth is and start dreaming, not just for my children, but for me, too. Time to stop mourning the loss of one thing and celebrate the start of something new. In short, time to get on with it.

So this is me. Getting on with it.



8 replies on “Goodbyes and Get-On-With-Its”

Oh, I am so proud of both of you! Having had the most wonderful pleasure of meeting your kids, this makes me so happy. It’s a great milestone for you to share.

You are a fantastic mother, friend and woman and you are raising beautiful children. xoxox

Aww, this post is so sweet. I know it must not have been easy to say goodbye but you did it *hugs* and at least she’s only half an hour away, you’ll still be able to see each other lots!

Good on you! <3

Thank you, Rebecca, I do feel lucky she’s so close, especially since she considered going to Italy!

OMG, I’m totally crying, it is so hard to understand you, but harder to know that you are so right, and that sooner that I think I’ll see my own kids go away, and that as hard as it seems we as moms and dads, will have to carry on, and live our own dreams..
thank you!!

You’re welcome, Rose. I hope it helps a little when the time comes for you to say your own goodbye. We have to do what’s best for them and that means letting them leave to experience the world on their own. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.