Category: Friday Poll

Sometimes, when a day is really tough – or when the night before has been really tough – you just need a pick me up.

Am I right?!

Writers are notorious for their consumption of candy, chocolate, and coffee (I once heard a murmur rise like a tidal wave in a group of writers at a conference when word got out the conference organizers had forgotten to order coffee). Sour Patch Kids used to be my weapon of choice for motivating me to keep working, but I figured if I didn’t want to be diabetic by the time I was 45, I probably should just STOP.

Now I chew gum in all kinds of flavors to avoid candy. But I have to admit to an ever-present addiction to tea and coffee. I’d like to break it eventually, but right now, my days seem to be a cycle of sleeping when I’m tired and caffeinating to wake up again.

Probably not the healthiest thing in the world, but it’s working for me right now.

How about you? What’s your pick me up of choice? Coffee? Tea? Sugar? Or maybe that good old fashioned pick me up — SLEEP? Or maybe… all of the above (because in this poll, you can choose as many answers as apply)!

Weigh in with the Friday Poll!

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I’ve come to the conclusion that being published has allowed me to see the best and worst in people. I’ve been the grateful subject of tremendous support, endless encouragement, and appreciation from all over the world. I’ve had the privilege of talking to, learning from, and befriending many talented people (published authors and otherwise) and have seen the writing community rally around people in need due to all kinds of circumstances.

On the other hand, I’ve seen reviewers be downright mean, witnessed high school-esque backstabbing, and rumor-mongering that would make a Mean Girl proud.

And then there are things I just don’t get. Like people who have NEVER liked an author’s work but keep reading and reviewing.

Now, OF COURSE these people have a right to read and review what they want. They can hate every one of an author’s books and keep reading and reviewing if they want.

I guess I just don’t get it. I’m SO BUSY. I’m lucky if I get to read all the books I’m DYING to read. So if I haven’t liked someone’s work in the past, especially if I’ve tried more than one of their books, I just don’t bother reading the others. Not because I think they’re terrible hacks, but because I acknowledge that not every writer is for every reader. Writers have certain styles and specific voices, and there’s just no way every one of us is going to connect with every one of you. Some people want heavy character development and don’t care much about a unique plot. Others want fast-paced action and don’t like characters who navel gaze. Some readers like tons of setting detail. Others find it boring and slow. I can go on Goodreads and look at the books I think are the most brilliant contributions to literature in the last 100 years and still find lots of people who rip on it without reservation.

So I tend to skip titles – even heavily hyped ones – by authors I just don’t connect with.

But that’s just me. And it got me thinking about books and authors and second chances. I can’t help wondering if I’m in the minority, if everyone else gives every author an endless number of chances to win them over. I guess it would be a mixed blessing; awesome that people keep giving your work a try, not so awesome if they start reviews with something like, “I’ve never liked so-and-so’s work, and this one was no exception.”

What about you? How many chances does an author get to win you over before you decide they’re just not for you?

Weigh in with the Friday Poll (and feel free to discuss in the comments)!

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Since we’re getting ready to host 30+ teenagers from Rebekah’s future college class (SUNY New Paltz Class of 2016! WOOT!), I thought it would be a good night to ask you guys about hanging out.

Namely, how do you like to do it? I’m a small crowd person, in general. I like hanging out in a more intimate group of people, sharing wine and great conversation. There are a few exceptions – concerts and film festivals to name two. But most of the time, I like to keep it low-key.

How about you? Weigh in with the Friday Poll!

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I have a confession to make; I’m terribly, awfully, horrifically anxious around unfamiliar people. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a small group or a big one, whether I’m meeting one person for lunch or giving a speech in front of a room full of people. The experience is agonizing, not just during the event or even immediately before it, but for days and sometimes weeks leading up to it.

I’ve gotten better. Yoga and meditation have helped me overcome a lot of my high-strung tendencies, and they have given me tools for managing my anxiety, too.

Like BREATHE. That’s a good one. And remember that no matter WHAT happens during this event/speech/meeting/lunch, it will pass, as all things do.

But still. It’s hard. And the funny thing is, when I tell people that I suffer from social anxiety, that I feel shy and embarrassed and self-conscious in front of people, they almost always look at me incredulously and say some variation of, “You?! Psh! Riiiight.”

I credit my years in sales and marketing for the ability to look someone in the eye, to shake their hand and smile, uttering all the socially expected niceties when I really want to puke and run. I’ve learned to put on a good show, but I’m still learning to really, truly enjoy these moments and events instead of dread them, because really, when they’re OVER, I almost always find that I’ve enjoyed myself.

With all of this, I was intrigued to read this article in the New York Times book review on a book titled; QUIET, THE POWER OF INTROVERTS IN A WORLD THAT WON’T STOP TALKING, written by a woman who considers herself to be an introvert of the highest order. I haven’t actually read the book yet, but now I’ve added it to my TBR list. It sounds like a book whose time has come, because I have this theory that more people are socially anxious than we realize. Like well-versed travelers in a foreign land, many of us have learned to do and say the right thing, but I’m always surprised at the number of people I speak to who admit feeling downright sick when forced to socialize with others.

Is it a product of our modern day society? Of the fact that we can and do keep our distance from our fellow man through a variety of electronic devices? Of that fact that we’re all SO DAMN BUSY that we don’t have time to socialize anymore? To visit our neighbors? To check on the elderly couple who lives next door or bring a cake to the new family on the block?

Are we losing our ability to truly connect with other human beings?

I don’t know, but I WANT to know. So for this week’s Friday Poll (yay! The Friday Poll is back!), I’m hoping you’ll share your thoughts on the matter. And feel free to comment, too!

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Also, check back tomorrow for my first A Week in the Life post. As suggested by Jana, one of my favorite readers, I’ll be posting random pictures from my week with little or no explanation. Should be fun!